Tuesday, June 12, 2012

It's all in your head..

It's RAGNAR week! I can't believe it is already here! About a month ago a friend of mine asked if I wanted to sub-in to her RAGNAR team. The guy on her team who wanted out REALLY didn't want to run and even offered to cover half the entry fee for whomever was willing to sub for him. I tell you, that lucky sub is ME! I did a relay race last year and I loved every sleepless minute of it. (Well, hindsight may be a little rosy, I recall some very sleepless moments that I did not enjoy.) But, overall it was an incredible experience and a RAGNAR relay was quickly bumped to the top of my running bucket list.

I had just finished the Salt Lake Half a few weeks before signing up for team Shaka Laka and had been taking it super easy on my training. My next half isn't until September and I didn't plan on starting that training until June. So, I did some reworking on my training schedule and hopped back on the bandwagon. I will admit, that the training CERTAINLY hasn't been what it ought to be, but I am SO EXCITED!

In fact, speaking of my totally lame training, I have realized something interesting. This last week I have been stressing a lot about the race. I am running one of the most difficult legs of the RAGNAR and it has me more than a little bit freaked out. I keep asking myself, "Who do you think you are to just jump into a 15 mile weekend with a freakishly intimidating 8 mile run up the side of a mountain?!" In those moments all I see is the little, unathletic theater girl who I always was. The girl who walked the fun run in school just because she resented anyone telling her that she had to be athletic. The girl who shies away from laid-back, pick-up games of anything because she is afraid that someone will discover that she sucks at sports and isn't athletic like EVERYONE else seems to be! All of my old fears of not being able to keep up with everyone else have come rushing back.

But then you know what I remembered? Running has taught me that I can do hard things. If I am determined, if I am patient, if I am consistent, if I go at my own pace - I can do anything. I just ran 13 miles 6 weeks ago for heaven's sake!

It is amazing how much negative thinking can effect you! It is no good!

I am strong. I am healthy. I am determined. I am a runner.

It really doesn't matter when you cross the finish line, it matters that you cross it.

I realized on Saturday when I saw people complete a 3 hour marathon and then returned to watch others cross the finish at 6 and 1/2 hours, that all of those people had performed with herculean effort. They had all done something amazing.

So, you know what 8-mile-uphill-crazy-run?! Bring it.

Give me this mountain.

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