I wasn't supposed to be a runner...

"The magic of a marathon isn't in the 26.2 miles on raceday; it's in the nearly 500 miles of training that happens in the months before. It's the countless feelings, frustrations, and fears I have worked through while running... You see, I wasn't supposed to be a runner. But I am. And my life is better because I chose to be one." 

 - Stacy Lucier

I was never supposed to be a runner. I was ALWAYS the "not athletic" one. I stubbornly walked the fun run when I was in high school just show the world how "not athletic" I was. They couldn't make me do it!!!

Then, a few years ago, I started running. It was partly to lose weight and partly because I think I was somehow starting to get wise to the fact that telling my body it didn't need exercise wasn't *actually* replacing it's need to get out and move. And you know what? I was surprised at how happy it made me. What had I been missing out on?! Had I even realized how happy I wasn't when I wasn't running? On some level I started to understand that I had been without true energy, clarity, and rainbow colored happiness!  I loved it!!! I was slow and I got injured all the time - and that was ok!  I liked myself for it! I was doing something I had never done before! Every run was longer, every mile was faster, every step was one step further than I had ever gone before!

Then, 9 months ago I moved.

I packed up my little mazda and moved 600 miles away from my friends, my family, and my routine. I moved away from the canyon where I used to run and the gym where I used to go to spin class. You want to know something that is not a secret? Transition is hard. Transition is heavy. I would love to say that I soared through that time on my running shoes like a bird coasting above the storm and that I ran my troubles away, but I didn't. I ate oreos. The difficulty made my feet weigh a thousand pounds and all I wanted to do was stay in my bed and not have to face finding safe running routes and working new shoes into my post-grad pathetic budget. Was it really even worth it? 

While lounging in bed and looking at my phone, Instagram showed me pictures of happy, fit women who were running double digit-miles every morning and had perfectly sculpted abs, dream jobs, adorable children, and for whom the sun smiled when it awoke every morning. They kept posting things like, "It doesn't matter how fast or far you go, if you run, you are a runner." Really? I mean, I actually have a lot of love for those women and have found many of them to be a source of inspiration to me, but as I looked at their negative splits and amazing quads, I wondered if they really thought I was in the same camp or even country as them. Maybe I wasn't a runner after all. I was never going be that. I was back to square one. 

Even if I did want to return to running, it would mean conquering basic runs again. It would mean hauling my significantly larger butt out the door and slogging through incredibly slow miles with more than a couple of walk breaks (which would surely be disguised as returning text messages midrun, needing to retie my shoes, or take a photo of the awesome sunset that I just had to post on instagram). How had I gotten this far from last year? I ran my first half marathon last year - and then I ran 3 more! How could I start again when every run would remind me how much I had regressed? 

Honestly? I don't know. 

The only answer I have is that I know that I can do it. Because I already did. I know that, while I feel behind, I am certainly stronger than when I first started. Falling behind doesn't negate everything I have done before! Maybe my legs or my lungs aren't as strong as they were 9 months ago, but they remember. There is still so much residual goodness! I know what it is like to be strong. I know how good it feels to get up early and feel that rush of endorphins that will carry  me through the day. Why do I fight that? I fight it because it isn't easy for me. It's hard! I have to haul all 5 feet 10 inches and 9 months of oreos around with me! I have to get up early, change my clothes, wash my clothes - A LOT! cause I sweat A LOT!, I have to wear a sports bra! WHA?! I am not fast! I am not fit! I am not a runner! I wasn't supposed to be a runner! I was supposed to be able to skate through life not caring about all of this stuff! But here I am! I can't fight it. At the end of the day, fast or slow, short or far...running makes me happy. And it turns out that I am worth the work. 

So I am resigned.  Running, I love you against my better judgement! 

I am a runner. And I love it. I guess I'll see you out on the road. 

Daylight Savings

For some CRAZY reason, I have gotten up early almost every day this week. That means that I am getting up in the 5 o'clock hour as far as my body is concerned. 5 o'clock! That is SO EARLY. But I will tell you a little secret: I love it. I recently started a Wellness Challenge with a friend in the ward and some ladies who are, I believe in Arizona. There are several things on the list of  "must do" for the challenge that I couldn't fit into my regular day. So, I decided that I needed to maximize my mornings. Sleep tries to convince me that it is not a good idea to get up earlier - but I love it, I really do. I get up, do some reading, eat breakfast not in my car, go for a walk, or do something else a little active. I don't know how I keep forgetting, but I really do love mornings.

I find that one of the things that I love about getting up early is that the world is still in the morning. It is the one time of the day where I don't feel like I have to fight my way out of expectations and noise to find a moment of peace.

Walk days are awesome. We live nestled in the middle of the ghetto, but if we walk just a few short blocks, we enter the Palo Alto Baylands Preserve. My good friend who just lives around the corner shows up at my door at 6:55 and we power walk through the most lovely little place while talking about the deep things of the world. I don't know if there could be a better way to start the day. This is a picture from my walk on Monday. Because we were out there a daylight-savings-time-hour earlier, we got to see the sunrise. What a wonderful world we live in!

. I am also loving the extra hour of daylight in the evening. Life just seems easier when there is a little extra sunshine in it. I am always amazed at how much better I feel about EVERYTHING whenever spring rolls around. I am excited to be able to come home from work and enjoy beautiful evenings outside. If I were still at home in Utah, I would sigh and wish that the weather would always stay this way - in California, I pretty much get my wish. Wow. 

New Beginnings

I have been away for a while. Sometimes transition can be overwhelming.  

Since I have made this move to California, with all of it's seemingly endless crazy adventures, I am learning so much about who I am, what I am capable, where my value lies, and where my life is headed. And it has more or less exhausted me entirely. I would like to start blogging again, but not necessarily because things are now rosy and fine. My life is incredibly wonderful, and truly blessed, but it has been, and continues to be, a daily challenge. I hope that it is alright if I use this space as a place for healing, encouragement, inspiration, and sharing. 

I started this blog as a running blog. However, over the past couple of months I haven't been exercising, letting alone running with any kind of regularity or consistency. There didn't seem to be anything to write about. However, as things have been difficult I often find myself reflecting on the experiences I had training for or running 4 half marathons last year. Running brings me peace and clarity. Running not only helps me to develop a strong and healthy body, but it fosters an appreciation for the gift that this body is and for all that it can do, even when I have let it sit idle for much too long. 

SeRUNity is just one kind of peace that I am currently working to invite more of into my life. As I continue to blog I hope to be more honest and more diligent. I hope that by sharing the good and the bad, I will be more aware of the goodness in my life, and that by sharing, I will realize that I am not alone in this - that none of us are. 

So, there it is. If you are one of the few who has been reading my blog, plan to see a lot of advice popping up here on how to be more compassionate with yourself, how to start over when you have gotten off track (with food, exercise, life in general), how to invite positive feeling and banish negative thoughts from your life, and hopefully, how to be grateful for the whole crazy process. I think that gratitude is remarkably healing and I am pretty sure I will have a lot to say about that in the future. 

For now, I would like to end this post by sharing a poem and a beautiful painting that have been inspiring to me today:    

The Weaver

My life is but a weaving

Between my Lord and me;

I cannot choose the colors

He worketh steadily.

Ofttimes He weaveth sorrow

And I in foolish pride,

Forget that He seeth the upper,

And I the under side.

Not till the loom is silent

And the shuttles cease to fly,

Shall God unroll the canvas

And explain the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful

In the Weaver’s skillful hand,

As the threads of gold and silver

In the pattern He has planned.

She Will Find That Which Is Lost - Brian Kershiznik 

I am an auntie again!

Theodore "Teddy" Nathaniel Gibson
5lbs 14oz
19 inches

Congratulations to my baby sister on her beautiful little boy! Being an auntie is the best! I can wait to see him!

2013. It's gonna be epic.

This is my first post of the new year! I may be a little bit behind, but I also haven't started any of my resolutions. I figured that since most people only stick with their resolutions for the first 2 or 3 weeks of the year, I just wouldn't start mine until then. That way I will miss the resolution-sucking-vortex that is January...right?

My new year's was great. I have a friend who has friends with a condo up at the North Star Resort in Tahoe. Most of the group hit the slopes while we were there but last minute plans combined with the I-was-unemployed-for-7-months nothing-money that I brought with me, I opted to bum around the village at the resort. There were a few of us who did and we spent two days sitting by the fire, watching little kids ice skate, drinking hot cocoa, walking through the winter wonderland, and hitting up the hot tub and the steam room. 

Can I digress for a second here? I have never been in a steam room. Sauna, sure. Steam room, no. Where has it been all my life?! I fell in love. I also maybe spent a bit too much time in the steam room and not enough time re-hydrating because my run the next morning was an epic disaster. I set my alarm and was up and out of the condo around 6:30. "6:30am the morning after New Year's Eve?!" you say, "Jennica, you are a super human rock star!" I know, I was amazed at me too. I really wanted to start the year off right. I, obviously, had the whole gym to myself, but I felt like I needed water every 30 seconds of my run. It wasn't until the tail end of my pathetically labored 3 miles that it finally dawned on me that all my time in the hot tub and steam room before had drained me of every extra ounce of water my body had in it. While it may have been an idiotic excuse, at least there was an explanation, I was scared for a minute that I had lost my running mojo.

But guess what?! I still have it! And that is very important. Why? Well, I have decided that my major 2013 resolution is that I am going to...

drum roll please...

run a full-freaking-marathon!

CAUSE WHY NOT?!

My sights are set on the Nike Women's Marathon. It will be in San Francisco in October. I would like to run this marathon for several reasons:

1. You get to run across the Golden Gate Bridge
2. I have 8 months to try to prepare/convince myself that I can do this crazy thing
3. Hot men await you at the finish line to present you with a Tiffany box that has your finisher's necklace tucked inside. Yes.

Bring it on 2013.

2012

2012. Wow. I can't believe this year is almost over. As I look back on the year I realize that I did a lot of traveling and a lot of running. Somehow I always end up traveling, even when I do silly things like going to grad school that really should make traveling an economic impossibility, but somehow the universe keeps working in my favor. Overall the year was fairly miraculous. The journey from finishing school, going 7 months unemployed, and finding a job and moving to California was never dull. The year was jam packed with adventure, heart break, best friends, loads of change, days at the pool, miles on the pavement, and lots of love both given and received. I am one incredibly blessed girl and this year, like so many others, was full of undisputable evidence of that fact.

Here are just a couple of highlights from 2012.

January: Ran my 1st half marathon - Disney World
February: Went to the Grand Canyon!
March: Went to Seattle on a career trip for school cause I thought I would end up working there :)
April: FINISHED GRAD SCHOOL! Ran my 2nd half marathon - Salt Lake Marathon, SLC
         And my baby sister got married!
May: Went to South Dakota to see Mt. Rushmore - cross it off the bucket list!
          Turned 30!
June: Visited my lovely, darling friends, Emily and Natalie, in Phoenix, AZ
         Ran my first Ragnar - Wasatch Back
July: Led a group of girls in C25K and cheered them on at their first 5k!
August: Miraculously had the opportunity to attend the wedding of one of my very best friends.
September: Ran my 3rd half marathon - Disneyland! Completed the Coast to Coast Challenge!
October: Ran my 4th half marathon - Utah Marathon - SLC
November: Accepted a job with the March of Dimes and moved to California
                 Visited my dad for a quick weekend in NYC
December: Started a new job, made weekly visits to San Francisco, met loads of new people,and spent a wonderful Christmas holiday with my mom.

2012 was not a bad year, indeed. Now to top it all in 2013. Looks like the pressure is on. I am going to have to make some seriously awesome resolutions.

My Jolly Holiday or I Love My Mom SO Much!

Well, I have now been in California for a full month. I am in that strange place where that seems completely unbelievable both because it seems like there is no way that I could have been here that long, but also because I am shocked that so much has happened and it has only been a month. 

I had an absolutely incredible Christmas. My mom came out and we pretty much had nonstop fun for 4 days. We went to see the Oakland temple, went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium, the California Academy of Sciences, had dinner in Sausalito on the water, saw the Union Square Christmas tree, saw the Golden Gate Bridge, wore matching Christmas pajamas, met up with old friends, participated in an impromptu live nativity with my singles ward, watched White Christmas, Elf, and Mixed Nuts, saw the Baylands, and wrapped it all up with Chinese food for Christmas dinner a la A Christmas Story. I won't lie, I cried when she left. But mostly I was just happy that she got to come out. It was a very Merry Christmas indeed!

So surreal.

Merry it was Christmas! I will post about my jolly holiday soon, but first I wanted to brag about today's weather! I met up with my dear friend Janhavi for lunch today. We spent the better part of our childhood together and haven't seen each other in  at least 6 years, and it had been even longer before that.  It was so good to catch up. It has been wonderful catching up with old friends, they have all grown to be the most amazing women. After lunch we went to get cupcakes and ate them outside. Outside. Folks, it is the 27th of December and the sun was shining bright!  I think moving here was not a bad idea.

In running news, my brother got here this week and I took him  out with me for a run last night. He hasn't been out running in a long time and I am pretty sure the run was a bit brutal for him, but it just made me exited for him. While it is certainly difficult, I love the initial feeling of conquering the run. I love when you are first starting out and you feel stronger every day, each run is a milestone and every step takes you further than you have ever gone before.

It was also just nice to have a running buddy. Hopefully he is as exited about this as I am!

Ladies of Luxury

Last night I went out for an evening of holiday cheer with some girls from my ward. They have a little group that they call the Ladies of Luxury. They get together every once in a while to do fancy things and last night was no exception. We went up to San Francisco to see The Nutcracker at The San Francisco Ballet. It, of course, was incredible. Everytime I go to the ballet I wonder why I don't do it more often, I find it inspiring, and I could always use more of that in my life. The theater was so fancy, and for an added bonus, they had juice boxes and butter cookies at intermission. That part may not have been fancy and luxurious, but it was fun. I can't remember the last time I had a juice box. It was delish.

It is again a small world. I came in late with another girl who had ridden BART up with me because our jobs had us running a little behind. The theater was dark, so we just took a couple of empty seats near the rest of our group. At intermission the people who had those seats came and we all shuffled around a little to make sure we were all in the right place. I ended up next to a girl named Carlee who knew Erin Masihdas! Yet again, it's a small world after all!

After the show we went to the Top of the Mark and had fancy dessert while a fancy pianist played some fancy tunes and we looked out on the city and it's incredibly fancy view.This is a lifestyle that I would not mind becoming accustomed to.

Speaking of which, I have now been in California for two weeks. And I think I am starting to become accustomed. It does still freak me out a little bit everyday when I get on the 280 and start my commute. The commute to the place I work from the place I live. Yeah, definitely still weird. But fancy.

Weekend Update: Holiday Party Style

Let me tell you what, if you ever have to uproot your life and start everything brand new 600 miles away from home you should do it during the holidays. There has been so much going on here, and this weekend was PACKED with parties and activities that totally rocked my world. Saturday morning I went to a Christmas Morning Party that was hosted by the chief party girls in the Stanford 2nd Ward. More than 60 people showed up in their PJs, exchanged white elephant gifts, drank hot coco, and ate to their hearts' content.

Next was a Relief Society activity where, among other things, we decorated sugar cookies! I have a lot of love for the Relief Society. It is so good to have a place to go and just hang out with the girls. There are so many incredible, intelligent, and fabulously fun women around here. I have been here just under 2 weeks and I have already been blown away by the kindness of everyone I have met.

Saturday night I went to an Ugly Christmas Sweater party. (See photo above) I only found out about the party Saturday morning. As I didn't have an ugly sweater, I decided to wear a fabulous party sweater. I figured I had to make it clear that I wasn't participating so that people wouldn't think my everyday sweater was an ugly one. YIkes. This party was packed with people from all over the Bay Area. I made some fun new friends, among whom were some hilarious guys who came down from the city. We hit up In N Out after the party and I am pretty sure that we will all be best friends forever more. Late night post-party burger runs work wonders for new friendships.

Sunday was church, which kind of counts as a party. We sand Christmas songs and I got to see all of the new friends that I had met the day before at the parties. It totally counts.

After church I drove out to Livermore for a Gingerbread House Decorating party that was put on by Kristin who was my best friend when I lived out here as a kid. It was so fun to see her and to catch up a bit. I am pretty sure we are going to see if we can't have a slumby at her parent's house sometime this week for old time's sake.

After the party I got back in the car and headed back to Palo Alto. It was a long drive, but luckily it was also gorgeous. Livermore is out past rolling green hills and vineyards that were dotted with grazing cattle. On the way out there it was sunny and about 65 degrees. Seriously?! It is December. The weather is one thing that I am certainly not having a hard time getting adjusted to.

The evening ended with a German Advent dinner. We had bratwurst, sauerkraut, cabbage, and lots of other delicious German foods. The German speakers who were in attendance sang a German carol and we lit candles that counted for Advent and Hanukkah. There were gold coins for Hanukkah and we enjoyed throwing them at one another.

By the time the party wound down, I was absolutely exhausted. I felt happy, loved, and included. Things have been a little wild, but it couldn't have come at a better time. This is exactly what I need to be able to connect with people and get a bit of a jump start on my crazy new life out here.

Almost every day, probably especially when I see the temperature and it isn't in the 30s, I think to myself, "Seriously?! I live in California?!", and it freaks me out a little bit every time. I still can't believe that I am doing this. But here I am. And I am jumping right into the deep end, and you know what? The water's fine.

Working 9 to 5

For 6 1/2 months I woke up every day wondering what I was going to do with my life. Then I got up, maybe searched for some jobs, watched some TV, cleaned my room, did some traveling, went for a swim or a run, took a nap, spent time with my friends and family, and again, wondered what on Earth I was going to do with my life. Then one day, I got a call for an interview, and 4 weeks later I am living in California. Monday through Friday from 9 to 5, I know where I am going to be. 

The door to the office. Where the adventure begins.

 My first day of work was good. We did some orientation, had a staff meeting, I learned how to use the copiers, and I learned where the bathrooms are.  I feel good about the office and the job, and feel really good about the people that I work with. There are aspects of the job that scare me to death and I hope that I can really do this. I think I can. Today was even better than yesterday. We started talking specifics and I am getting a better feel for exactly what I will be doing. I am still scared.

First day of work picture. The mirror at home is small, so the only one I really had access to was the one in the bathroom at work. Classy, I know, but I am a girl and felt it was a necessary thing to document.

I am really looking forward to my life in a couple of weeks when I am settled in and can start to feel like I actually know what I am doing. Though honestly, I can't complain. While I am still nervous and working on making both my work and living situations feel more like home, so many wonderful things have happened since I have gotten here that have helped me to feel like I belong and have helped me to feel like moving out here was a good decision. I would be a hot mess for sure if I didn't feel that reassurance. 

My desk. Complete with bamboo plant! 

I am thinking of naming the bamboo plant on my desk. Any suggestions?

WEEKEND UPDATE!

So, I know that I already told you about most of the weekend, but I just had to take a minute to highlight my totally awesome Sunday.

Denise was kind enough to let me tag along with her to church. I made some new friends and bumped into some old ones (It's a small world after all! Especially in the Mormon world!). The ward here is packed to the brim with good-looking, intelligent, and kind people. It is really intimidating. But like I said, they are nice, so that makes it a little bit easier. And one of the girls in the ward remembered me from when I visited this summer and invited me to hang out with her "Ladies of Luxury" club! We are going to go see The Nutcracker and we are going to be awesome. I feel good about both of those things.

At the end of church my friend Dean (who was in my Provo ward), came to find me and said that he needed a soloist for one of the songs the ward choir is singing for the Christmas program and asked me to fill the spot. Why not?! So, off to choir I went. I got a ride home with one of Denise's roommates and she, like everyone else, was absolutely delightful.

My dear Dean friend had me over for dinner and I ate my first hot meal (not including that Little Ceaser's pizza) in almost a week. I was so grateful and was very happy just to not be eating alone. After dinner I went back to Denise's and watched the First Presidency Christmas Devotional with a group of people from the ward.

I also got to talk to my mom and several good friends at the end of the day. I went to bed feeling happy and loved. This may just all work out after all :)

The Hills Were Alive!

 I will never think of the Sound of Music the same way again. We had a great time. The theater was in the Castro district, so the show was packed full of girls who had always wanted to grow up to be Julie Andrews and packed full of boys who had also always wanted to grow up to be Julie Andrews. We sang at the top of our lungs, booed and hissed at the Baroness and at the nazis, laughed at well, pretty much everything, and cheered madly when the Captain and Maria finally kissed. We even got two little pieces of edelweiss to wave during the song. I really loved it when the nazis were looking for the Von Trapps in the abbey and several people pulled out flashlights to aid in the search.  It was hilarious. 

I drove up with two girls from the ward and we met up with about 10 other people from the ward. We didn't stick with them for long however, and the three of us ended up sitting by ourselves because the drunkies in front of us were a little out of control and kept making jokes that they thought were funny, but they really weren't. Overall, we had a simply marvelous time!

This morning I went to the Oakland Temple. It is so nice having a place to go anywhere in the world that feels like home. The icing on that cake is that the nativity was all set up.  I remember driving up to see the Christmas lights at the temple when I was a kid. It is funny to go back as a grown up. I cannot believe that it is already December! My how time flies. But I am kind of counting on that right now. Things are getting better, but I am looking forward to life in a few weeks when I am a little more settled in and feeling more at home. Until then, here's to the holidays!  

I'm Going on an Adventure!

One of my favorite things to do on Thanksgiving is to go to a movie with the girls in my family. For the last 2 Thanksgiving, that means we have been at the first showing Thanksgiving morning for the last 2 movies in the Breaking Dawn series. I won't lie, I find them utterly entertaining. They are good enough to keep my attention, and bad enough to keep me laughing. I think it's a great time.  But that isn't really what I want to talk about.

Before the movie there was a preview for The Hobbit. At one point in the preview Bilbo Baggins is running away from his home, apparently trying to catch up with the rest of his traveling group. Some little hobbit neighbors ask where he is off to and he just yells over his shoulder, "I'm going on an adventure!"

That is exactly how I feel. The last couple of weeks have flown by so quickly and I feel like I just ran away from home, shouting back to all who would listen that I am going on an adventure!

Tuesday morning I finished cramming everything I own into my Mazda 3 and headed west.

Thanks Mazda for making a tiny car that can fit so much stuff! And thanks Milla for reminding me that "I've got this.

"

 Highlight of the trip. Restroom's what? Thanks Elko! 

Sunset leaving Nevada

The last few days have been a blur. They have included a LOT of driving and a LOT of cleaning.

I am just finally starting to feel like things are coming together and that all of this might just work out after all. When I first arrived, the house that I am staying in was entirely empty. There was supposed to be a bed, but there wasn't. There wasn't much of anything. I don't know how long it has been since the house was lived in, but I can tell you that things hadn't been cleaned in a LONG time. I thanked heaven that I had tossed my sleeping bag in the car at the last minute before I left, I laid the sleeping bag out on the ground in an empty bedroom and tried not to wonder what I had gotten myself into.

I totally experienced that moment of panic where I started asking, "What on EARTH was I thinking packing up my life and moving 600 miles away from home, friends, and family?!" I thought about the fact that it would be totally possible for me to just put everything back in the car and sleep in my own bed again before the week was out.

The next day I cleaned, cleaned some more, went to Costco for food, and went to Target for an air mattress.

Thanks Mom!

Thanks Target!

Now that things are a little cleaner, my stuff is all starting to find a place in the house, and after getting a good night's sleep...and maybe not getting up until 10:30 this morning, I am feeling much better about the world and the adventure that is before me. Even when I thought about the possibility of going back home, I knew that I wouldn't do it. I am going on a adventure. No one said that all of the adventure would be wildly exciting adventure, adventure is a package deal, and it comes with a fair amount of crazy. So, it all started out a little more adventurously than I had planned, but this is what I signed up for and I know that it will get better and continue to keep getting better.

To leave you with the hope that I am not entirely tragic right now, I will say that I have already connected with some friends of friends in the area and I am going to a Sound of Music Sing-a-long in San Francisco tomorrow! Boosh! Let the fun adventure begin!

For now I am safe, and still happy thinking of all of the people who love me back at home and who were so kind and instrumental in supporting me in this grand new adventure. I left with some handmade Christmas decorations, a box of life (and sanity) saving supplies, money for my first Costco visit, and with the memories of lots of good pizza with wonderful friends, more parties, trips for ice cream, zombie killing video games, an awesome new journal, good talks, and lots of hugs. I love all of you, and you had all better get out here to visit me soon!

The adventure continues!

Well, the job interview went well yesterday (I think, it is always so hard to tell), and apparently the next step is...yet another interview. I wasn't sure when I was going to hear back, so I decided to make the most of my day instead of just sitting around waiting for the phone to ring. First, I drove up to Oakland and spent some time at the LDS temple there. It was beautiful. I love to go to the temple when I need to get away from the busyness of the world and just spend some time thinking and praying. 

Next, I headed to Costco to get gas. THANK HEAVEN for Costco and for cheaper gas. Just before I pulled into Costco, I got a phone call...

I have another interview tomorrow.

Phone interview. 11:00am.

I am hoping that the fact that all of this is happening so quickly is a good thing.

With the interview scheduled, and my gas tank full, I headed out to Half Moon Bay. The beach is another great place to go to get away from the world and find a little clarity :) I think it has something to do with the water. I also think that those of us who were born in California are connected to the coast. I feel so at home on the beach. I feel so much like myself there. Oh, and BONUS, while I was there I saw dolphins jumping! DOLPHINS! In the wild! I consider that one step close to seeing a whale. That is my one true dream.

After the beach I stopped by Redwood City to check out the house I would most likely be staying in if I get the job out here. Isn't it great? It used to be my grandma's house and I hadn't been there at all for almost 20 years. It is funny how easy it can be to feel 10 years old again.

Speaking of feeling tiny, I ended the evening by going out to dinner with my best friend from the good old San Jose days. We went out with her parents and her boyfriend and laughed about how we used to dance to Paula Abdul in her backyard and about how we miss watching Jem after school. No matter what happens with the job, this trip has been really great. It is incredible to have an opportunity to reconnect with people who were such an important part of your life for so long, and then, even after all these years, they still feel like family. 

Today, I am grateful for Kristin! Thanks for being an incredible friend. You are a beautiful person, and I am proud to know you!

Running 13.1 miles vs Driving 13.1 hours

As I drove for hours and hours and hours yesterday, I thought about how running long distances has made it easier for me to handle anything in life that takes a great deal of stamina.  And I came up with this -

 How running 13 miles and driving 13 hours are similar:

Mile/Hour 1 - I am ready to go! I have my playlist, am rocking out to my first song and I feel like I am on top of the world!

Mile/Hour 4 - I am still feeling good. Surprisingly good, actually. I am proud of myself for pacing myself well and feel like I could go for days.

Mil/Houre 6 - I need a snack. Drink more water.

Mile/Hour 7 - I have gone more than halfway! YAY! But I still have about halfway to go! BAH!

Mile/Hour 9 - I am a rockstar. I have done something amazing. This race is MINE!

Mile/Hour 10 - I hurt. My legs hurt (or in the car, I can't feel my bum anymore). Why? Why do I do this? What ever made me think I could do this?! Why am I doing this?!

Mile/Hour 11- Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going.

Mile/Hour 13 - Almost done! Don't think, just go! Surge to the finish!

Finish line! - Oh, that wasn't bad at all! When are we doing it again?

It was a little scary how similar these two experience were for me. But it was nice, because I felt like I knew what to expect. So much of running is mental. You just settle in and go, and eventually you make it to the end. But you have to pace yourself, you have to plan, and you have to be patient. This is also great advice for driving. :)

Nevada is boring...

I drove through Nevada for a really long time today...and with zero cell service. There is not much to see in northern Nevada.  (see photo) In good news, tonight I am sleeping in the home that I used to always go to slumber parties at as a kid. The parents of my best friend (from about age 2, you'll we were ten) were kind enough to put me up while I am out here in Cali.

The drive out here was good. I'll post soon about how long distance running has made long road trips more bearable. But right now I an going to sleep. I traveled for 13 hours today, am one hour back for time zone, and another for daylight savings. I'm fried.

Oh, and today I am grateful for friends who support you even if they only see you once every 3-5 years.

More gratitude - family style.

Today I am grateful for these nerds (and the other two siblings who were too young to swim at the time).  I am also grateful for a mom who bought swim team buttons with our pictures on them. Who could ask for more?

PS My California adventure starts bright and early tomorrow morning! Put good things out in the universe for me, will ya?

Matt and Lou

It's Saturday, so you don't get much of a post :)

On this 3rd day of November, I just wanted to say that I am grateful for my baby sister and brother-in-law. I dropped by their place tonight to pick up a tent for my trip next week and on my way out the door Matt stopped me and said, "If you need anything, just call Emily and we will come and rescue you." And he meant it. No matter where I was, they would come to save the day. It was the sweetest thing ever. I sure love these two kids.

I went back!

I DID IT!

 I WENT BACK TO TREADMILL CLASS!

I wasn't kidding last time when I said that I felt all kind of crazy shame for bailing out of class early on Monday. I am notorious for trying something once, sucking at it, and running away, but this time I went back! What a brave thing I did. Yay me.

In other news, today I am grateful for people who treat me incredibly well even though they don't really know me. Specifically, I am grateful for Monte, who works at the Mazda dealership in Orem, and Julie, who owns a studio called Bouffant in Springville, and is the only person on the planet who I trust to cut my hair.

These people see me maybe once every 2 months and they always greet me like I am an old friend. Monte recognizes my car on the road because he knows the stickers that I have on the back of my car.  Julie always remembers to ask about the silly little details of my life that we talked about last time I was in to get my hair done.

It means a lot. They could just smile and say thanks, and their job would be done, but they truly invest in me as a person, not just as a customer. I hope that I am like that to others. I hope that I don't save my kindness only for those who earn it, but that I treat everyone well - like they deserve to be treated. I am so grateful for people who care even though they honestly don't have to. They make this world a better place.